What do you want your life to look like?
The vision for my life has changed dramatically over the years. I think that’s because I had so many self imposed limits. I couldn’t see past the white picket fence with 2.5 kids and a dog. That’s what everyone wants, right? That’s the American Dream! That’s the end goal. But then what? Because it’s not the end. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a mother. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. But I’m more than a mother. I’m more than someone’s wife and homemaker. I’m also more than a number in corporate America. Those things just seemed highly appealing after feeling lost for so long. At least it’s what everyone else is doing and it’s an option when you don’t know what else to do. But I know I came here for more. There’s something inside me that’s been brewing my entire life. I can feel it percolating right under the surface. It’s ready to be exposed and explored. It’s ready to be birthed from the ashes of what I once thought I wanted.
Like many of us on the road of life, I took detours from my path. Some of them were absolutely beautiful. But most ultimately gave me the much needed lessons of what I don’t want. Unfortunately, it takes the hard lessons for some of us because our lives have been packed to the hilt with schooling that doesn’t nurture us nor lead us to our purpose. It’s more a time filler and training on how to fall in line with society’s expectations. When that’s over and we’re left feeling empty instead of inspired, we look for others / other things to fill the void. So here I am at almost 40 finally stepping into who I came here to be. Even now after all the years of doing things that didn’t fill my soul, the thought of stepping out and into who I really am can be terrifying. It can be scary to go against all you’ve ever known as true. It can be scary to expose who and what we really are to the world… But guess what… it’s time to do it anyway. It’s time to follow the call. It’s time to finally be who I am. It’s time for you to be who you came here to be as well. Even when it’s not entirely clear, we must keep moving. We must keep doing the work to peel back the layers so we can see with clarity.
Deciding that you’re ready is the hardest part. I know I loved my stories (but not really) for quite some time. They kept me safe. But safety is always an illusion. There are just fleeting moments of calm in a chaotic world that feel easy to cling to. When it’s easy to put parameters around it, we market it to ourself as something we need because it feels predictable. Even though it’s predictably miserable at times, it can feel better than stepping into the unknown. But I’ve shifted my thinking around this… what if I saw the unknown as exciting. This makes life an adventure…and I’ll take adventure over monotony any day. With adventure comes a clear mind, body and soul because once we stop stifling we can begin to heal.
So start digging. If you don’t know what it is you’re yearning for, start by removing all that’s in your life that doesn’t truly align with you. By creating space you’re telling the universe you’re ready. You’re not only ready, you are worthy of the life you’ve always wanted to live. If you’re a parent, your children are worthy… they deserve a role model who lives authentically, leading by setting the standards high for everyone’s life. By setting the tone with truth and authenticity, we end the cycle of suppression that’s been passed down. I never want my children to swallow what they can’t digest. So I will make the hard choices, I will excavate and free all that doesn’t belong so that I can bring in all that I’ve ever desired. This is the new cycle…the new paradigm. <3 Jess #newparadigmmama